I promised Sheila and Nthenya that I would begin to write again as I reduce my reading. I did not journal this weekend but I promise to do so before we next meet. I told them how is topped journaling because it became too painful and then a habit not to do so. Nonetheless I am seeking clarity in my life and there is something Nthenya said that my mind seems cluttered with all these thoughts and ideas and until I find a way of offloading it, I will not be able to have that clarity is eek. The answers I seek are probably within me but with all the information getting in and no outlet it’s almost a futile exercise. I agree as I feel like my life is some loop going on and on with no distinct direction.

 

I was contemplating giving on something I had started but had to stop because of my hectic work schedule. Last week Julian taught us about moving from ‘A HAVE TO’ attitude to ‘A WANT TO’ attitude. I want to complete what is started and I want to do it with the initial motive and enthusiasm that I had.

 

So this doesn’t necessarily count as the writing I was supposed to do but it certainly helps. Which reminds me of a conversation I had with my friend. We are planning on going to Pemba Island at the end of the year. I was like the first champion of the whole idea and full of such faith that somehow we could do it but these last two weeks I had allowed doubts to get in and I couldn’t help but wonder if I was overreaching but over the weekend my friend reassured me with such confidence that come new year we will be in Pemba…and who I’m I to doubt. So that is one specific thing I am praying and believing that God will just make a way. The rest may be hazy and mixed up but this one thing….

 

Big Brother is over. It was about time. I was tickled silly to read all the tweets on peep’s reaction to the result. Tickled silly.

 

Let me begin my fabulous week