This is a post to remind myself that being vulnerable and open is something to be celebrated rather than met with shame even when another person doesn't respect or honor that via their actions or words
I had five months with this guy and I thought we had something special. Apparently I was wrong seeing as he stopped communication for no apparent reason. Closure is not a right; something I learnt in my twenties. No one owes you closure and the best thing is to pick yourself and move one. I am doing that daily. Daily my friend, and there are days it seems its every minute as my mind replays everything. I have so many questions but I must silence those questions. Then there are days I miss him so terribly and feel so bad for doing so. Then anger, sadness and despair. It's all part of letting go of us.
I will be well. I know that. I will be well. A part of me is more than hurt. I am angry that you cheapened five months . I love music specifically 90's music so while jogging yesterday this song came on and the lyrics are kinda applicable:
BRANDY LYRICS
"What About Us"
Why don't you return my calls?
Why you trip out where I be?
You don't ever come to see me
You say that you're too busy (what?)
What the hell?
I don't have time
Why you messin' with my mind?
I can find another guy
Someone who will treat me right
I don't need this bullshit
I won't put up with it, any longer
You can, go if you want
I don't, need you pity
I will, be just fine
If you decide, that you want to leave
Close the, door behind you
I just, want to know what...
What about all of the
Things that you say
What about all of the
Promises that you made
What about all of the
Nights that you gave
What about all of the
Things you told me
What about all of the
Things that you say
What about all of the
Promises that you made
What about all of the
Nights that you gave
What about, what about
What about us? What about us, us?
What about us? What about us, us?
I thought you said you were different
Was that what I heard you say?
Said that you'd love only me
Thought that you'd be all I need (what?)
What happened to promises?
Said that you were a better man
Your words have no way with me
Cause you're counterfeit, I see
I don't need this bullshit
I won't put up with it, any longer
You can, go if you want
I don't, need you pity
I will, be just fine
If you decide, that you want to leave
Close the, door behind you
I just, want to know what...
What about all of the
Things that you say
What about all of the
Promises that you made
What about all of the
Nights that you gave
What about all of the
Things you told me
What about all of the
Things that you say
What about all of the
Promises that you made
What about all of the
Nights that you gave
What about, what about
What about us? What about us, us?
What about us? What about us, us?
I had five months with this guy and I thought we had something special. Apparently I was wrong seeing as he stopped communication for no apparent reason. Closure is not a right; something I learnt in my twenties. No one owes you closure and the best thing is to pick yourself and move one. I am doing that daily. Daily my friend, and there are days it seems its every minute as my mind replays everything. I have so many questions but I must silence those questions. Then there are days I miss him so terribly and feel so bad for doing so. Then anger, sadness and despair. It's all part of letting go of us.
I will be well. I know that. I will be well. A part of me is more than hurt. I am angry that you cheapened five months . I love music specifically 90's music so while jogging yesterday this song came on and the lyrics are kinda applicable:
BRANDY LYRICS
"What About Us"
Why don't you return my calls?
Why you trip out where I be?
You don't ever come to see me
You say that you're too busy (what?)
What the hell?
I don't have time
Why you messin' with my mind?
I can find another guy
Someone who will treat me right
I don't need this bullshit
I won't put up with it, any longer
You can, go if you want
I don't, need you pity
I will, be just fine
If you decide, that you want to leave
Close the, door behind you
I just, want to know what...
What about all of the
Things that you say
What about all of the
Promises that you made
What about all of the
Nights that you gave
What about all of the
Things you told me
What about all of the
Things that you say
What about all of the
Promises that you made
What about all of the
Nights that you gave
What about, what about
What about us? What about us, us?
What about us? What about us, us?
I thought you said you were different
Was that what I heard you say?
Said that you'd love only me
Thought that you'd be all I need (what?)
What happened to promises?
Said that you were a better man
Your words have no way with me
Cause you're counterfeit, I see
I don't need this bullshit
I won't put up with it, any longer
You can, go if you want
I don't, need you pity
I will, be just fine
If you decide, that you want to leave
Close the, door behind you
I just, want to know what...
What about all of the
Things that you say
What about all of the
Promises that you made
What about all of the
Nights that you gave
What about all of the
Things you told me
What about all of the
Things that you say
What about all of the
Promises that you made
What about all of the
Nights that you gave
What about, what about
What about us? What about us, us?
What about us? What about us, us?