My home girl is graduating with the title of ‘doctor’ so a gazillion hurray!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! She has worked hard and has gone through hell and back. I am so proud of her that no words can express it. God has sure been faithful to us guys this year. So that’s awesome news.
In a few hours I start my leave!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Yipee…My body is already out of here….and tonight partyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!That is if my limping foot lets me. I decided on Leopard beach resort and man I’m excited like wow!
I started going to the gym two weeks ago and I am proud to say I am loving the result that it will yield in the future. For now its aches and pain but I feel much better for having taken control. When they say working through the pain…you learn that when working out.
Finally got my hands on EAT.LOVE.PRAY will read it while on leave.
I forgot my phone at home hence I have stayed a whole day without my phone. A major feat.
This wasn’t a real post just to say my girl is a doctor and I’m going on vacationJ
Today I will let words from Jemima’s blog speak what’s in my heart coz I am unable to pour out the bucket loads of words in me…
The surest way to become unhappy is to keep your hurt inside.
If there is a secret to mental health, this is it: tell the people who hurt you that they hurt you when they hurt you.
Hurt is the pain of the moment. Hurt is happening right now. Its cause is right in front of you. Hurt speaks for itself, motivating you to limit your pain.
Anxiety is pain in the future. It may happen, and then again, it may not. Anxiety inspires you to get out of the way of danger.
Withheld hurt turns into anger. Anger helps you to express your hurt by energizing you to protect yourself.
When you hold in hurt, you redirect your anger at yourself. Such inward anger is called guilt. It serves no positive purpose. It only makes you think of getting even, fills your head with bad thoughts, and erodes your self-confidence as you begin to doubt your goodness.
Obviously the only anger that makes sense is still attached to the hurt that caused it.
You need to learn to express your hurt as it happens.
Telling someone how he or she hurt you can be risky, because the person who hurt you is probably someone you care about.
What if the other person calls you “oversensitive” or tells you that your hurt is unimportant and doesn’t take your feelings seriously?
If the other person doesn’t care about your feelings, he or she doesn’t care about you. The sooner you know this, the better. Why waste more time?
What if the other person says he or she hurt you out of anger because of being hurt by you? It’s a good time to discover the truth, clear the air, and become friends again.
What if the other person can’t remember hurting you or simply denies that the hurtful event ever took place?
He or she may be telling the truth, because most people do not hurt others intentionally. When you are silent it is sometimes hard for others to recognize that you’ve been hurt.
Expressing your hurt sometimes puts your love or friendship on the line. It always tests your love for yourself.
It is always the right thing to do in any relationship that you value.
Express your hurt as simply and as directly as possible when you first notice it.
Tell the other person how you were hurt. You can mention that you are angry, but don’t display the anger or attack. That will only hurt the other person, who won’t be able to listen, making matters worse.
Whatever you do, don’t allow your hurt to age.
If you cannot express your hurt to another person, you cannot express your love, for old anger blocks positive feelings.
If you value your love, you need to express your hurt.
Holding in hurt is the way that love dies.
I show my hurt when I am hurt..
so I can feel love the rest of the time.
A friend played for me some baby face music and it took me back to the good music of the 90’s and of course I had to share lyrics to one of my favourite songs in the grown and sexy album. Enjoy
about you, about you,
it's the, it's the
early evening conversation
sharing how the day went down
cancel dinner reservation
cause i'd rather just hang out
just the two of us
sitting at home just watchin movies
or jsut be chillin at the crib
call up and order us some take out
or maybe somethin' from the fridge
then have some one on one
sometimes we wake up too each other
wrapped inside each others arms
oh what i wish that we were lovers
but you don't want to go that far
that's not who you are
you wanna know what's in my heart
then open your arms
it's the getting to know you
all about you
it's the thing i most desire
getting to know you
being around you
turns the passion into fire
and i'm so alive
everyting i look into your eyes
i'm falling in love
early morning conversation
blowin kisses thru the phone
knowing your thoughts before you say them
see i just called to say hello
ain't it wonderful
the way i feel when we're together
especially when you're in my arms
i can make love to you forever
but you don't want to go that far
that's not who you are
you wanna know what's in my heart
then open your arms
it's the getting to know you
all about you
it's the thing i most desire
getting to know you
being around you
turns the passion into fire
and i'm so alive
everytime i look into your eyes
i'm falling in love
{bridge}
(everyday's a)
everyday's a cause for celebrating
(so amazed i'm)
i'm so amazed you spend yoru time with me
(my anticiapa-ting)
see every day is a brighter day anticipating
ooh i'm...
this might be the night
that you-
make love-
sweet!
Down memory lane…Some time back a friend of mine reminded me of a tale about my little brother…I have two younger brothers and both have been thoroughly spoilt by my mum as at some point they have been lastborns. The actual lastborn was born when my family was what you would call comfortable and there was hired help to do whatever he may need. So it was to our shock and amusement when my father regaled us with a very surprising scene he had come across in my brothers room. At that time my brother was about 10 years old. Apparently he convinced the help to allow him to sleep in the morning with his hands and feet up in the air so that the help could oil and dress him for school…my father saw this bizarre scene twice silently without my brother’s knowledge. We could not believe our ears. In any case I was really shocked that he would be comfortable with such a thing…of all the nonsense in the world! Of course as usual my mother rushed to his defence saying he was so young…her ‘baby’…of course that just allowed my father, my other brother and I the opportunity to make fun of him calling all babyish names…which annoyed my mother to no end..but no one could reason with her as regards spoiling my brother or show her how ridiculous it was for such a grown up child(Oxymoron?) to be dressed and more so in bed! The picture my dad painted had us all laughing including the culprit himself…Those were good days for my family…it was such incidences that had us all rallying for my small brother to go to boarding school for two years. I must say he completed his terms yesterday and he is much more independent no thanks to my mum who actually cried when we took him to school.
Talking of boarding schools….My brother went to one just a few kilometers from us hence we would visit as frequently and the facilities were up to standard. I was talking to another friend of mine about the mad bomber series in Passive aggressive Notes when I informed him that for one year while in Primary(elementary school) I went to boarding school in a very remote part of the country. I was very young though at the time I considered myself very grown up. My mother says I was born independent that if I could have crawled from my womb I would have 9 months notwithstanding. Three of my cousins were already at that school and so each time they visited I begged my parents to let me join them and eventually they gave in figuring my two older cousins would take care of me while the other one who was my age would keep me company and in any case I had proved quite a survivor in my few years or so my dad would have me believe. The tales of that school could keep a blog running for quite some years but one I want to share is as regards this young girl who we should call Sally. She turned out to be a mad bomber of some sort. This story has some gross details so ye of weak constitutions walk away.
Sally as with the rest of us fourth graders was 10 years or there about in this Catholic school(aka hellhole in the middle of nowhere) run by militant nuns who felt no remorse in caning us silly. All fourth graders slept in this long dorm in double-decker beds. Across from our dorm was a graveyard for sisters who had passed away and near it was this huge tree and many a tale was spun as regards the ghosts and spirits which would hover near it. Inside the dorm was one loo which was only supposed to be used for a short call and if anyone needed to do a number two they would have to brave the dark night past the graves to the other end to find the pit latrines. After hearing all the skin crawling tales no one ever dared to. The nuns shut down the electricity immediately we were in our dorms after prep classes at night. The background has been set. So in comes in Sally. Her grandmother passed away and she went for the funereal and as per custom there was food galore which she took full advantage seeing as at school food was a precious commodity. On her return to school she found that the provincial drama festivals which also meant more food and the little girl pigged her face out. That night it seemed her stomach finally revolted at the quantity and mix of food it had to endure and in the cover of darkness sally decided to perform a performance worthy of an Oscar. Sally slept in the last bed which was like closest to the bathroom but she decided for some, bizarre reason to run right to the centre of the room in darkness and squatted there and unloaded her meals then proceeded to run across the room unloading more of her meals to cap it all spraying the whole loo like the MAD BOMBER. Note all this occurred while we slept like lambs. At this point the plot thickens as two characters join in. Let’s call them Stella and Joan. These two were best friends and bunkmates. So as common practice among females , when one needs to go to the loo they are accompanied by their friends and so these two decided to brave the darkness and run across the big dorm to reach the loo. Incidentally they were barefoot. Only to encounter a big squishy wet trail on the way there and the smell was so awful and so they started screaming waking up the whole dorm. Most of us had flashlights and soon the horror that was sally’s waste was revealed. Awake, the smell was so awful and the sight so disgusting we could not imagine w e had slept through it. Joan and Stella were near tears with rage at the sight of their feet covered in excrement at 2am in the morning. Of course no one fessed up and so they decided to do a search which involved everyone getting off from their bed and stripping while the two sniffed. Now I sounds ludicrous but at the time it made sense and we were so innocent..ironically Sally was the last one to be inspected and she was refusing to get out of her bed…but she underestimated the power of two enraged girls who have sh*t on their feet. They pulled her out of her bed and did their sniff test but more incriminating was the soiled panty found under her pillow. Disgusting does not begin to describe the whole tale. To everyone’s disappointment we could not give her a beating as the nuns would have whipped up to our graves but the tongue lashing that girl got till 5am when we could go shower, I am sure to this day her ears still ring. The nuns did whip her and punish in front of the whole school. In hindsight perhaps the school should have had better facilities after all she was only ten years old. Now I can laugh about it but that night we were all in a rage wondering why she would do such a thing but it seems some people carry the behavior into adulthood…I wonder if its mischief or just Psychological sickness…
ALAINE IS IN KENYA!!!!!!!!!!!!!yeah so she showed up at uptown and man that chic is down to earth. All I can say she is worth every groupie love she receives. AND she shook my hand.’nuff said
Chookooloonks’ Karen did an article on authenticity her exact words:
“Grab a pen and paper, and list everything you love to do that fills you with joy and/or grace. It can be shooting photographs, or cooking, or taking a shower, or running a mile, or singing or whatever. Write deeply profound things, or silly little things, like organizing the junk drawer in your kitchen. Write until it exhausts you. Just write whatever fills you with joy or grace.”
1. Reading. When I read all else calms down. If it’s a storm going on in me or around me; it recedes. Calling it’s hobby would be to demean it. Reading takes me to places that I am unable to describe.
2. Dressing up. There is just some joy in looking so effortlessly fabulous yet knowing it left your wardrobe in disarray.
3. When my boys confide in me. When I give them my perspective and it’s like I have unlocked some world mystery and knowing that they trust me. It makes me feel valued and appreciated for me.
4. Laughing so hard my legs are up in the air like a little baby. More so when watching a favourite show or sharing joke with friends
5. Dancing. Like reading all else receded
6. Music. When I wake up it’s the first thing I look for and at work all day it’s what keeps me motivated.
7. Everything that pertains to blogs. Be it blogging, reading blogs, discovering blogs.
8. Shopping. Be it shopping for the house, shoes, clothes. I love shopping…
9. Alone time. Snuggling under my duvet doing nothing but allowing my thoughts run free. Sitting under a tree just appreciating nature while having conversations in my head that are so damn interesting it’s almost a disappointment to realize I am all alone.
10. Internet research. I love looking or stuff in the internet. The sheer satisfaction of finding that thing which seemed impossible…
11. Eating at my favourite restaurant whether I’m alone or with my friends.
12. Being pampered at the Salon. It makes me feel so special.
13. Lying in bed holding my huge teddy bear knowing that I don’t have to wake up and rush anywhere.
14. Receiving a long email with fun news or detailing what a wonderful person I am…
15. Words. Be it in email, snail mail, texts, blogs, books, phone conversation, face to face conversation. Words rock way better than words
16. Men who have awesome laughs and smiles. The sounds of people’s laughter is so distinct and unique…especially if I’m into you
17. Going on holiday to awesome places and having an awesome time.
18. Having hilarious conversation with my family which seem so odd to others but make total sense to us.
19. Colour. I love colour. The bolder the better.
20. Spending time with my friends.
Due for leave and initially it was to be here but it’s started raining and we could not risk going where it could also be raining and cold. The place is amazing as its in the middle of a national park and the facilities are beyond amazing so the other option is to the coast and I’m torn between here …IN LUST WITH THE PLACE LIKE FOR TWO RUNNING YEARS. My family was to go here some time back but each time it was fully booked. The other option is here…my boss raved about this place and it being all inclusive is very persuasive but my thoughts are filled with the former…so confused or maybe just greedyJ